Well, it has been a busy weekend and week. We took a small overnight trip that went really well, at least I thought it did. The week has been a bit rough. I find him disappearing into his work more and more, maybe just to get away. I don't know. The new meds seem to be helping a lot, but I just can't be totally happy with this hanging over me.
He was up when I left for work this morning. He admitted that he knows I am trying, and that was good. I told him he was worth it, and he said he appreciated that. Then... he reminded me he only had committed to staying till I got a new job and through the first of the year. It seems like that may be a good thing. I have been wanting nothing but a new job for a year. In fact, that has been the cause of a majority of our fights and problems. Now, after months of nothing, I am finally getting calls for interviews. Again, I soooo want to be ecstatic, but I know, as soon as I find a job, it may be over. How can good and bad occupy the same space.
I just want to be all happy, not happy in pieces.
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